Boredom
by g3nesis1
Summary: Kayura1 and I did this at school when we were VERY bored. It is very funny. Lol. please r and r.
1. YOU EAT RELISH?

**Boredom – Chapter one: YOU EAT RELISH!**

"Well, excuse me for being a mere mortal!" Duo yelled to Heero. He sighed and turned his head around. "He thinks he's Evil Kinieval and hardly speaks! Why don't you give up and stop pretending to be human?" Duo looked over to Heero.

Heero gave… the 'loathe' look. (Duhn, duhn, duhn!)

"You're not strong enough to be my enemy…" Duo just kept talking, stupidly.

"Really?" Heero gets up and unsheathes his katana, giving him the evil look once again.

"Eep." Duo whimpered and ran away.

"Thought so."

Duo threw a pot a Heero's head and Heero blocks it easily and throws a dagger right back at him. He missed his head but caught his shirt, leaving him dangling on the wall behind him.

"I… Hate you." Duo whispered.

"Omae o korosu, baka." Heero smirked, stepping towards him.

Duo flailed around. "No touchie! No touchie!"

Heero raised his eyebrow and chuckled. "Just keep doing that…"

"RAWR! ARGH!" Duo yelled as Heero waved goodbye and started to walk away. "Don't you walk away from me!" Duo cried.

"Huh?" Heero turned around quickly, his katana still drawn and his fingers wrapping around the hilt tightly.

Duo gulped. "Go ahead.. Walk away from me.. Go head." He cowardly replied. Heero smiled and kept walking. "Stupid, rude, damned, incorrigible, robot-bastard." Duo muttered. He jumped when another dagger sticks to the wall right beside his face. "How many of these do you have?"

"Many… Wanna see?"

"NO! Uh-oh….AHHHHHHHHH!"

Thunk, thunk, thunk, thunk, thunk, thunk, thunk, thunkthunk, thunkthunkthunk

"Phew!" Duo sighed with relief, seeing that none of them actually hit him.

"One more." Heero showed him, raising it up into the air. Heero threw it and it landed right between Duo's legs. Right below his…umm…his…(you know what I am talking about! And Duo passed out.

"Stupid human." Heero busted up laughing. "Listen, silence!" He shook his head. "Beautiful…" Minutes passed as Heero was still admiring the silence when Duo quietly awoke.

"You bastard! Get me out of here. Damnit!" Duo screamed.

Heero was startled by Duo's sudden awakening. He jumped up and landed on the floor with a thump. He realized it was loud-mouth's ramblings, laughing.

"HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE…" Breath… "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE…" Breath… "EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Breath… "LET ME OOOOUUUTT!" Duo managed to get himself free of the dagger and checks himself for blood. He looks down at his um…um… 'friend.'

"Phew, my precious!" He breathed a sigh of relief. "My one…My only… My precious… I've been waiting for a girl like you!" He sang to…it and reaches down to kiss it, when Heero looks over.

"Ew! Get away freak!" Heero jumped back from Duo with wide eyes.

"Huh? You're the one carrying 13 daggers! I know, I've counted them."

"I don't carry them," Heero smirks, "they came from spandex world!" He points to his shorts.

"AND YOU DARE CALL ME DISGUSTING?" Duo screeches.

Heero smiles. "Yeah, so what?" Heero smiles again and sticks out his tongue and Duo bit it.

Heero flailed around, going in circles taking Duo off his feet. "Yet… Ggo!" Heero screamed.

Duo lets go and flies to the back of the room. He gets up and says, "Yum… hot dog!" Heero scowls. "With ketchup!" Duo cries suddenly.

"And?" Heero asks.

"RELISH!" He wrinkled his nose. "You eat relish!" He stuck his tongue out, but quickly stuck it back in when he saw the glint in Heero's eyes. "Eep."

But Heero caught it. Duo flails around (also making Heero get off of his feet).

"Yet Ggo!" Duo screamed.

Heero did as he was told and was thrown to the back of the room. He got up and said, "Ice cream, chocolate, a hamburger, with ketchup, no lettuce, and…" he tasted his tongue. "Spaghetti!" He cocked an eyebrow. "Jeez, you're a pig, aren't you?"

"YOU EAT RELISH!" Duo pointed a finger. "MY EATING HABITS ARE PERFECT COMPARED TO THAT!" Heero again raised an eyebrow.

"Heeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrooooooooooooo!" Relena cried.


	2. Relena RUN LITTLE ANIMALS OF THE FOREST!

Duo and Heero sighed heavily.

"God help us." Heero said.

"He can't and he doesn't want to. He's busy!"

A blonde and pink blur whooshed through and suddenly, Heero was on the ground. "Heeeeeeeeerrrrrrroooooo!" Relena shouted into Heero's face. "I'm sooo happy to see you!"

Duo tried to inch away towards the door.

"DON'T YOU LEAVE ME HERE!" Heero cried out.

"But…but…"

"NOOO!"

"DUO!" Relena cried.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" He cried as Relena hugged him.

He plopped over with fright. Heero got up and looked at him. "See, look what you did, Relena! Now, I have to go wake him up." Heero told her as an excuse.

"No!" She spoke.

"YES!" He yelled.

"Eep… okay…" She answered, running away.

"Good girl."

Duo's eyes popped open. "Yay!"

"Shut up!" Heero hissed. "Do you want her to-"

"Was that Duo I heard?"

Both groaned in horror.

"I'll kill you for this," Heero said, threateningly.

"Eep." Duo squeaked.

"No!" He answered Relena.

"Okay, I'm going to go to the building that I heard was going to blow up, okay?"

"Okay, go get killed… Oh, I mean, go have fun!"

"Okay, bye!"

"Bye," they said cheerily.

Duo looked thoughtful. "I don't believe in a God, but I think I'll go pray for her death."

"Good idea." Heero chimed.

"Bye." Duo scurried off.

"Bye."


	3. Silence

Duo ran into Wufei. "Woofy! Woof, woof!"  
  
"What do you want stupid?" Wufei rudely asked.  
  
"Oh, go bark up a tree."  
  
"INJUSTICE, YOU STUPID IDIOT!"  
  
Duo looked at him with puppy dog eyes. "Woof."  
  
Wufei's face got red. "I'LL KILL YOU!"  
  
"Wait until I finish praying," Duo advised before walking off.  
  
Woofie (oops, i mean wufei) smacked a smirk on his face.  
  
"Hehehe." He tiptoed behind Duo. He put his face behind Duo's shoulder. "What ya doing?"  
  
Duo punched him in the face. "Amen."  
  
"OW!"   
  
Duo chuckled. "Oh, and please don't let woof-dog kill me."  
  
"I'LL TORTURE YOU PAST DEATH!" Wufei (heh, heh) threatened.  
  
Duo got up from his kneel. "Don't make me come down there. I can smush you like a little bug."  
  
"Grrrr," was Wufei's only response.  
  
"Heheehehehehe," Duo smirked. "Come here little puppy, I wanna pet you. Come here."  
  
Wufei stomped off. "You shall feel the wrath of Nataku!" He warned.  
  
"Bark." Duo called after her, (oops, i did it again!) him.  
  
"You're so mean!" Quatre said, popping up from nowhere. Duo was momentarily blinded by his pink shirt.  
  
"Oh, no. Relena! Run! Animals of the forest, run!" He took a breath. "Be freeee!"  
  
"Duo, you're being rude," Quatre admonished.  
  
Duo fluttered his eyelashes. "I'm so sorry, massa Quatre. Please forgive me." He puckered his lips and fluttered his eyelashes again.  
  
"It's okay, Duo," Quatre assured.  
  
Duo rolled his eyes. "Yay," he said, with sarcasm. "Where did you come from?"  
  
"Spandex world."  
  
Duo blinked. "You came...from Heero's...pants?!"  
  
"No, just my face!"  
  
"AHHHHH!"  
  
"What?"  
  
"YOUR FACE HAS PEICES OF HEERO'S PANTS IN IT?!" Duo screeched.  
  
"It does? Can you point to where? or get it off for me?"  
  
"NOOOOOOO!" Duo runs away screaming and runs into Heero.  
  
"Get away, you freak!"  
  
"What?" Heero asked.  
  
"Quatre? You? Your pants?" Heero got a confused look.  
  
"Oh, yeah. Heero Yui not me."  
  
"Oh, thank god." Duo gasped in the air. "Wait...no, I dont believe in God..."  
  
"Allah is the one." Quatre said brightly.  
  
"Thank you, Shinigami!" Duo shouted, plugging his ears.  
  
"Shut up, Duo!" Heero hissed. "You might get Relena from that damned building, and then what?"  
  
"Ooops!" Duo quickly covered his mouth, but it was too late.  
  
"Heeero! Is something wrong?"  
  
Heero bashed Duo on the head.  
  
"No, Duo's still sleeping."  
  
"Okay, tell him I love him. I love you, too!"  
  
"EWWWWWWWWWW!" Duo screamed.  
  
"Duo!" Relena said.  
  
Heero quickly knocked him out. "Everythings fine." Heero called. "He's just...thinking in his sleep. Real hard!"  
  
Quatre's brow furrowed. "Lying's rude, Heero." He admonished.  
  
Heero glared at him and knocked him out too. "Ahh..." He said," silence once more." 


	4. Fabio

"Where's that dick, Duo?" Wufei shouted.  
  
"Here, you want him?" Heero played.  
  
"Yes!"  
  
"All well, Woofy!"  
  
"But, but.."  
  
"GO BARK UP A FUCKING TREE!" Heero screamed.  
  
"Now, you're being unecessarily ignorant." Qautre thought in his "sleep."  
  
"Shut up! Silence is golden."  
  
"He yells at me..." Duo grumbled, obviously "thinking" quite hard. "I'd give him a peice of my mind if it weren't for my precious..."  
  
Heero slapped Duo up. "Shut up!" He said, punching him out once again.  
  
"Maybe I don't wanna bark up a tree!" Woofy said.  
  
"Then go watch your hero, Fagio, oops... Fabio."  
  
A tear fell from Woofy's eyes. "Fine." He stomped off. "I haven't watched him for a week!" He paused, then, "INJUSTICE!"  
  
Heero growled. "Is there NO PLACE for SILENCE ON THIS EARTH?!"  
  
"Fabio, yay!"  
  
Heero pounded his head against the wall.  
  
"There is no wall." Duo screamed, awaking.  
  
Heero pounded his head again the author's invisible wall. 


	5. The Return of Relena

Duo walks up to Wufei and says, "you're a fag."  
  
"INJUSTICE! You are the fag, with your long ass ponytail!"  
  
"It's a braid!" Duo pouted. He then stuck his tongue out and started panting. "Woof!"  
  
Woofy gace him an evil look. "I hate you, but yet, KISS ME!"  
  
"Eww! Get away, fag!"  
  
Just then, Quatre came in.  
  
"Woofy?"  
  
"Squat?"  
  
Heero and Duo laughed at the names as Woofy and Squat hurried towards eachother and kissed.  
  
Afterwards, they ran off together in the orange sunlight.  
  
"Wooofffiieee!"  
  
"Squuuuaaaaat!"  
  
Hearts float above their heads as they twine their arms around eachother.  
  
"Squats mine!" Trowa shouted.  
  
"Bring it." Woofy told him.  
  
"It's already been buroughten!"  
  
"CAT FIGHT!" Heero screamed as they began to slap eachother.  
  
Duo went away for a few seconds and came back with a bucket of popcorn.  
  
"Super Headache Attack!" Trowa shouted, and pulled Wufei's hair.  
  
"Scissor attack!" Wufei screamed and Trowa screamed like a ninny and ran away.  
  
Wufei turned back, triumphantly.  
  
"That was mean, Wufei." Quatre said, pouting.  
  
"But... but..."  
  
"I don't wanna be with you anymore. I want Trowa."  
  
"You BITCH!" Wufei yelled, chasing Quatre in circles. "Get back here, you slut."  
  
"Shut up, fag." Duo called, and Quatre went to hide behind Duo.  
  
Wufei came up to Duo. "What was that, Ponytail boy?" He beat Duo up, mercilessly.  
  
"Ow, that hurt. NOT!" Duo screamed in Wufei's ear.  
  
"Shut up, or I'll bring Relena."  
  
"Nooooooooo!"  
  
"Yessss." Wufei hissed.  
  
"You can't you'll be tortured, too!"  
  
"She's just a stupid woman."  
  
"CHANG!" Wufei cringed at Sally's voice.  
  
"Yes, masta? What ya need?"  
  
Duo snickered. Wufei glared.  
  
"Do my dishes!"   
  
He left, muttering, "I have no right to pilot Nataku."  
  
"No, you don't!" Sally yelled. Sally, then, saw Relena. "Hey, girl!" She yelled as the rest of them scurried away quickly.  
  
They embraced. "Hi!" Relena squealed.  
  
"Hi!"  
  
"Hi!"  
  
"Hi!"  
  
"Hey, where's Heeeero?"  
  
"Over there," Sally points to the bushes.  
  
Heero paled to white. "AHHHHHHHH!"  
  
"Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeerrrrrrrrrrrooooooooooooooo! I'm going to hug you, and kiss you, and pet you, and hug you, and take care of you." She said, in a dopey voice.  
  
"I'm going to kill you, Sally. GET OVER HERE!" He screamed, chasing Sally, as Relena was chasing him. "Come here, help me Duo! Come here, TASKETE!"  
  
Duo grabbed hold of Relena and threw her against the tree. She was knocked out from the force.   
  
"Damn, and to think I shot Heero over her. Tisk." He shook his head, as Sally got ahold of herself.  
  
"That was totally mean!" Sally exclaimed.  
  
"Shut up, whore!" Heero screamed. "Go tell Barky to hurry up!"  
  
She did just that, and soon later, the howl of "INJUSTICE" could be heard. 


End file.
